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Narcissa Malfoy and Cassie Edwards
Jan. 12th, 2008 02:43 pmSo some actress named Helen McCrory is apparently going to play Narcissa in the Half-Blood Prince movie.
To be blunt, I was hoping that the photo in that link was just not a good one, but after taking a quick trip to Google Town to confirm... yeah, I am totally not feeling it. Granted, probably 95% of what I think of Narcissa is total fanon (Obligatory defensiveness: It's pretty good fanon), but it never occurred to me that that Narcissa wasn't an absolute hottie, even if she is a cold-hearted bitch.
As always, YMMV in reference to the hotness of Helen McCrory and/or Narcissa.
Ok, to add some more content to this, I want to share my thoughts on yaoi... I mean, Cassie Edwards. I have a friend who used to work at a library, and part of their job was to rotate the old paperback romances out of the collection and get the new ones in. This means that I used to get trash bags full of discarded books; mostly the fabulous "The Italian boss's agenda for the sheikh's virgin secretary doing the French baron's bidding in the rich man's world" category romances, but some other choice gems as well.
Anyway, one of these fantastic masterpieces was a Cassie Edwards novel. I wish that I could be more clear on the title, but since all of her books are "Savage (Noun)" or "Shadow (Noun)," it's hard to remember. Unfortunately, I had no idea of Edwards reputation as an author, and decided to give the book a go. It was really bad; not the worst I've read, but definitely somewhere in the running-up.
Anyway, I wanted to share some of the plot points with the internets because they are so offensive in of themselves, whether or not you think that she's a plagiarist (which I do).
Edwards' books are old school racist romances where out on the prarie, some beautiful, special snowflake of a white girl ends up with some hot hunk of burning stereotypical Native American love. In the one I read, the heroine's dad is some kind of military officer, in the era in which the US had those wooden fenced forts out in the west. Her dad (unbeknownst to her) is a total sicko who tortures the local Native Americans. Somehow, the fact that he has some prisoners leads to a major altercation where the prisoners tribe or clan (and if that's not the right terminology, kick me. I'm old enough that I learned in school that they were Indians D:) bust into the fort and lots of peoples are killed.
Anyway, during this, the Special Snowflake is abducted by the hot hero and goes to live in his tepee, where the other token white abducted girl is mean to her because she wants to be the one banging the hero. Lots of bizarre shit ensues, including some sexually deviant, evil white trader having the heroine's mom, who had left her dad to go be a saloon whore, amongst his harem of slaves and the Special Snowflake of course ends up abducted by him somehow too (I think that Mean White Girl had escaped from him). Also, at some point, the heroine returns to her dad's burnt out study to discover his secret Native American head-in-a-jar, and of course the hero gives her a special Native American name like "Lovely Bird That I Want To Hump." Oh, they live happily ever after, of course.
If you beg me, I'll dig through the bag of books in the closet for the title, because I know you want to read it.
To be blunt, I was hoping that the photo in that link was just not a good one, but after taking a quick trip to Google Town to confirm... yeah, I am totally not feeling it. Granted, probably 95% of what I think of Narcissa is total fanon (Obligatory defensiveness: It's pretty good fanon), but it never occurred to me that that Narcissa wasn't an absolute hottie, even if she is a cold-hearted bitch.
As always, YMMV in reference to the hotness of Helen McCrory and/or Narcissa.
Ok, to add some more content to this, I want to share my thoughts on yaoi... I mean, Cassie Edwards. I have a friend who used to work at a library, and part of their job was to rotate the old paperback romances out of the collection and get the new ones in. This means that I used to get trash bags full of discarded books; mostly the fabulous "The Italian boss's agenda for the sheikh's virgin secretary doing the French baron's bidding in the rich man's world" category romances, but some other choice gems as well.
Anyway, one of these fantastic masterpieces was a Cassie Edwards novel. I wish that I could be more clear on the title, but since all of her books are "Savage (Noun)" or "Shadow (Noun)," it's hard to remember. Unfortunately, I had no idea of Edwards reputation as an author, and decided to give the book a go. It was really bad; not the worst I've read, but definitely somewhere in the running-up.
Anyway, I wanted to share some of the plot points with the internets because they are so offensive in of themselves, whether or not you think that she's a plagiarist (which I do).
Edwards' books are old school racist romances where out on the prarie, some beautiful, special snowflake of a white girl ends up with some hot hunk of burning stereotypical Native American love. In the one I read, the heroine's dad is some kind of military officer, in the era in which the US had those wooden fenced forts out in the west. Her dad (unbeknownst to her) is a total sicko who tortures the local Native Americans. Somehow, the fact that he has some prisoners leads to a major altercation where the prisoners tribe or clan (and if that's not the right terminology, kick me. I'm old enough that I learned in school that they were Indians D:) bust into the fort and lots of peoples are killed.
Anyway, during this, the Special Snowflake is abducted by the hot hero and goes to live in his tepee, where the other token white abducted girl is mean to her because she wants to be the one banging the hero. Lots of bizarre shit ensues, including some sexually deviant, evil white trader having the heroine's mom, who had left her dad to go be a saloon whore, amongst his harem of slaves and the Special Snowflake of course ends up abducted by him somehow too (I think that Mean White Girl had escaped from him). Also, at some point, the heroine returns to her dad's burnt out study to discover his secret Native American head-in-a-jar, and of course the hero gives her a special Native American name like "Lovely Bird That I Want To Hump." Oh, they live happily ever after, of course.
If you beg me, I'll dig through the bag of books in the closet for the title, because I know you want to read it.
